ghghggfghh hi beloved.. you found the letter I made for you I really hope you like it sob.. I love you so so much Mika, more than anything in this whole universe. You changed my life for the better. I remember seeing your profile and thinking you were the coolest person in the whole world and desperately wanting to be friends with you and I was so so excited to be able to get to know you better. 

Meeting you was the best thing to ever happen to me. I genuinely think that we are soulmates like everything in my life has led up to you. You just make everything so much better. Before you it always felt like something was missing in my life and I’ve just been wandering aimlessly, trying my hardest to survive, spending every day just waiting to die because I couldn’t do it myself but after meeting you it was like finding a warm shelter in a blizzard or like the first rays of sunshine after a thunderstorm. The day I met you I found a reason to keep going and a future that I can actually look forward to. All the pain I’ve felt in my life I would gladly go through it all a hundred thousand times if I knew that I will end up meeting you.

You healed parts of me I didn’t even know was hurting and you continue to do so every day. Just being around you I feel like the weight of the world just falls off my chest. You’ve shown me how beautiful even the smallest things are. I really can’t thank you enough for pulling me out of hell my beloved. You mean the world to me genuinely. Every single time my heart beats it’s for you only. I want to live because of you and I want to keep going and do my best in everything no matter how hard it is for me because I know it will all be worth it in the end to be with the love of my life.

I never really realised how easy it is to be happy until you. Like usually when I am in a good mood it’s only as a distraction from the bad, but you make the bad things just go away. When I’m anxious even just the thought of you is enough to calm me down you just make me feel so safe. I feel like I can be myself around you and you won’t judge me or get angry. Sometimes I seriously wonder what I ever could’ve done in my past lives to deserve you. I just wish I could be with you in real life and hug you and kiss you and show you how much I love you and give back even a little of what you’ve given to me. I want to make you proud and I want to get better for you. I want to live longer for you and don't want to worry you anymore.

And looking back I’m not at all surprised by how quickly I fell for you. You’re just so perfect in every way possible. I don’t think I’ll ever stop getting butterflies with you. You’re just so nice and sweet and caring and you treat me so so so well. You’re also so unbelievably pretty. You’re actually the most beautiful boy in this whole entire world. If I kiss you all over while telling you all the things I love about you we would be there for hours and hours. I love your eyes, they’re so pretty. And the cute mole on your cheek I just want to kiss it so much. Your lips are so pretty too. I just really want to kiss you please I just want that more than anything. I love your voice. I listen to your tiktoks when I miss you just to hear you. I love your accent it’s really so endearing and I love the way you speak Finnish too it’s such a nice language and you make it sound so beautiful when you speak it. I love your hands and all of the things that you create your drawings really are so so good I love them so much. I also love your personality, you’re just so funny and sweet and easy to talk to. Your humour matches mine so well too I could just talk with you for hours and hours and never get bored. You understand me more than anyone else you’re like my other half and I feel so complete when I am with you. The stars are so proud that their atoms made someone as perfect as you, my beloved.

When you came into my life you made me the happiest boy in this entire world now I just want to make it my life’s mission to do the same for you every single day for the rest of time. I want to give you all the care and love you deserve and I want to always be there when you need me. You're so sweet and kind and funny and cute and nice and handsome and I love you with my entire heart and soul, my beloved. I will love you forever I promise I will try my hardest to keep you happy and healthy and comfort you when you feel bad. I will stay with you for as long as you’ll have me.

Rakastan sinua enemmän kuin mitään muuta, Mika. (I hope this translation is right..)

From your boyfriend, Vikram, who is so unbelievably in love with you.

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